Jacob tells us he is negotiating more and more with his co-workers, clients and even family members. "How can I master these skills?" he asks.

You can't negotiate effectively unless you understand your own interests and your own no-deal options.

Since the other side will say "yes" for its reasons, not yours, agreement requires understanding and addressing your counterpart's problems.

Spend time trying to understand how the individual you are negotiating with is going to sell this deal, product or concept. Go from being a person who drives the deal from your side of the table to the person who understands the deal from the other side. Before you can change a person's mind, you have to first learn where that person's mind is.

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